Bridezilla
FRIDAY:
Friday was awesome! I was so excited for the open house! And it ended up being incredibly awesome. So much fun to see friends and family. The food was great and everyone seemed really happy. I’m so excited for there to be family parties here in the future. Max and Hailey can’t wait to move in with us for a bit. It will be so much fun! And good training for when we have our own kids.
HOUSE:
We really do love this house. I thank God every day for it. It finally actually feels like its ours. It was kind of surreal for the first little bit. I actually drove to our apartment one time. Old habits die hard I guess. Its so incredible to have so much more room. We seriously love it. Lots of things are unpacked now. I’m waiting until after the wedding to unpack everything and do all the decorating etc.
We are seriously so spoiled! We are getting married, we have a house and we are going on a cruise!!!
BRIDEZILLA
So I don’t really know what happened. Saturday morning/afternoon was awesome. Lisa and her sisters did a shower for me. It was fun to see some of my friends. I admit I was a little bit sad that more weren’t there. But Saturdays are busy, I know how that goes.
So I think it all started with the computer problems. I had a big list of things to do that evening. I was trying to get more done that day, so there wouldn’t be quite so much to do on Sunday.
I was a little frustrated at first, but nothing too out of the ordinary. After all, I’m pretty used to working on house or wedding stuff with nearly all my spare time. I just know that is how its going to be until the wedding. Life is just busy.
So anyway a lot of what I had to, I needed a computer for. So first of all, I go to my computer and I can’t even get it working. So I had to wait until Adam got back from an errand. He fixed the computer and then left to go do something else. So the computer is working and all. I’m working on some last-second invitations and using my spreadsheet and looking up people online to get their addresses. I was trying to look at the yellow pages. So suddenly my computer won’t work and its very clear to me that I then had a virus on my desktop. How did I know that? Because 2 weeks ago I totally hosed my work laptop when the same thing started happening. Argggh. I was getting seriously annoyed. So I wait some more for Adam to get back and he lets me use his laptop, which actually I’ve kind of adopted lately. And then it freezes up….like completely. Adam tells me its not my fault, he had to reconfigure something or whatever. I was livid and started freaking out.
By the end of the night we completed all the tasks I needed to do (order nylons, check on my shoe order, book a hotel, find a bunch of addresses, add stamps to some sent back for additional postage, address some last minute invites, email the officiant, and a few other things) but not without seriously having a few panic attacks. I guess I felt completely overwhelmed. I had wanted to also finish the party favors and then I realized the officiant wanted our vows right away and Kim all the names and addresses for their family shower they are throwing me. And here I couldn’t get a computer to work for the lfie of me.
Then I cried about everything that has bothered me lately. My weight gain. Me missing my mother. Me being so bloody jealous of girls whose mothers did everything for their wedding. It all hit me like a ton of bricks and I found it hard to breathe.
I locked myself in a room and cried. Adam came and just held me. Then later I was crying, doubled over the dishwasher cleaning up after the open house. I just really wanted a break from it all. I wanted like 4 hours to not do any wedding, cleaning, or house stuff. Just was drained physically, emotionally, etc. And the crying fit did little to help with any of that. I had the worst bloody headache. Of course it was my period and I was having the worst cramps at the same time. I laugh about it now, but it was scary. I get stressed and may have a cry occasionally, but seriously not like that. I hope Bridezilla is gone and never comes back.
